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By the Corktown Critic, Writer of Anonymously Honest Reviews

I have never had my fortune told. When I think of fortunetellers I picture longhaired gypsies hidden in the back of circus tents cradling crystal balls. To me, the idea of paying money to have a wild-looking person guess my future seems a waste. And while I’m skeptical of psychics, I fear the chance of an ugly premonition getting stuck in my head. But then again, I expect a review from a virgin of tarot card readings will be entertaining.

Nancy is a Corktown legend. Located at 501 Queen East, she’s been reading palms, tarot cards and offering crystal and chakra cleansing for the last twenty plus years. In her words, she’s an energy reader and her readings are by appointment only.

I arrived with a plan. Share nothing unless I was asked a direct question. I was ready for a 30-minute tarot card reading, priced at $65 (somewhat negotiable, I discovered).

She fits every bit the physical stereotype: mid-fifties, short with black long hair and so did the room she sat me down in. Picture incense and lit candles and all of the religious memorabilia you can possibly imagine (statues, figurines, etc.) and line them along every inch of wall space in a ten by ten foot dark room. In the center of the room stood a table with two chairs; on top, a stack of cards and at least 5 crystal balls mounted on creepy old-woman-hand-stands. I struggled to take it all in.

What transpired in my half-hour read was equal parts entertainment mixed with the feeling of WTF-am-I-doing-here? She told me I would write a book one day; that my upset stomach from the previous week won’t bother me anymore; that my partner should go get a physical because she saw blood pressure warnings; that someone in my life (not in my immediate family) will die and that I have been here before and have lived several lives before this one. I enjoyed being told that my business is going to thrive, but I wasn’t too thrilled by her judgment that my kid be baptized and that if we don’t go to St Paul’s Cathedral soon, the demons will get him.

It was hard for me to give this one a rating since I have nothing to compare it to. But since Nancy gave me a tarot card reading experience that I will not soon forget, I give her an 8. I recommend it as the perfect place to go before getting a drink at The Dominion with friends. Nothing says conversation material like a tarot card or palm reading.